Introduction

Young: Jay-Z said 30's the new 20, right?
Fab: Have you SEEN the profile pic?
Broke: Frequently, but I’d outgrown Suze Orman’s smartly-named niche market before she’d even published that book—even while factoring in two smiling differentiators, aged 7 and 9.

Starting a new blog is always a weird thing for me. I never quite know what to say in the first post and I always have a mental image of walking into an empty, white room (a la the booting program in “The Matrix”) with my 4” heels clicking on the floor. Here? Yep, same feeling. Well, now that I've babbled for a bit, I suppose I can introduce you to the theme of this project. This blog will be the work-in-progress that will eventually become my book. My living guide for the YF&B single mom.... Ugh, that just sounds *bleh* to me. "Single mom" sounds so wack and middle aged (not that there's anything wrong with that--it's just not ME). I think I've only used the term "single mom" as a trump card. "Hey Quia, can I borrow $50?" "MAN, I'm a single mom! You can't ask me for money!" Anyway, I don't have a title yet, but I guess that's what publishers and marketing departments are for. That's ironic because I work in marketing. Interactive marketing. And I'll take that as a segue to explain why I think I'm qualified to write this book.

I was a 20-year old college drop out when I had my first child. Her arrival was a sobering wake up call to the fact that I really needed to get my sh*t together. Hanging out in a nearly empty apartment consuming pretzels and orange juice every day while my new daughter drank the benefits of WIC wasn't a long term option. Besides, I was making $10/hr at the time and I could barely pay for our living expenses. After my cash car died, I swallowed my pride and moved back home with my mom. The college I had my eye on offered full tuition benefits to full-time employees, so I got an admin job there, and applied for admission after a few months.

While I was working and taking classes, I met my [ex]husband and got pregnant with my son. By the time my son arrived, I'd quit one job at the university, and gotten fired from another. I gave up on the idea of working on campus and decided to apply for financial aid and attend full-time, while working full-time as an assistant manager at a retail clothing store. Fast-forwarding through the train wreck that was my 18-month marriage, I found myself at my mother's house--again, this time with two small children. I finally saw the error of my ways and put my dating life on the shelf--a high one. For three years, me and the kiddos resided in my mother's guest room while I attended school full-time, worked part-time as a file clerk at a law office, held several internships and an editorship at the student paper. Those three years were not an easy journey and it often involved a few of my professors overlooking the fact that I was asleep in the corner of the classroom. They knew what I was trying to do and they were sympathetic. For that I am forever thankful to them.

My children were among the guests at my commencement. I was 24 years old, then. I had lofty aspirations of graduating and coasting into a nice editorial job, but when none materialized, I started freelancing for a magazine that I interned for in my senior year. After about two months of underemployment, I landed my first job at a media company, managing their website content. I was earning $34k. It seemed like the ideal offer until I tried to support a household of my own on that salary. I lasted 18 months before a bittersweet departure to a technology company as a web designer, commanding a whopping (for me, at least) $50k salary.

I knew during the interviews that I would hate the job immediately (there is absolutely nothing sexy about system security) but I was in a vicious cycle of payday loans and I was out of payment deferrals on my car note. The job offered relief from my financial burdens and I started enjoying life a bit more. From putting some money aside in my 401k and Roth IRA to going out of town with friends several times per year, I was finally beginning to enjoy my money. And then I bought a house.

Suddenly $50k wasn't enough anymore. I received 100% financing and got a fixed 6.625% interest rate on a 30-yr conventional mortgage. My homeowners insurance and taxes are held in an escrow account, bringing my monthly payment to about $1,400/mo. That in itself wasn't crippling, but forking over twice my usual electric bill, paying the lawn man, and the kids’ skyrocketing child care costs, were. After-school care was double what I paid in my old apartment’s school district, and I no longer “qualified” for reduced-rate lunch and tuition. I put qualified in quotes because there was a little bit of dubious activity involved with the application for reduced-rate lunch and child care, but I digress. In my new school district lunch is about $2/day per child, and here's the kicker: summer camp averages $150/wk... PER CHILD. It was time to make some changes.

Counting it up, I logged about 18 months at the technology company before I ended up where I am today. In the interest of not angering HR, I will just say that my current salary put me in a new tax bracket. I am the first to admit that my compensation acrobatics defy the rules of logic, but I am not arguing. In all irony, I'm earning that kind of money doing work that I didn't even go to school for. I've been a net nerd since 1999 and everything I know (which really isn't THAT tech-intensive) is self-taught. And here I am... a web marketing specialist in the private aviation industry. GO. FIGURE. But I know what I'm doing, and I love my job. I earn enough to comfortably pay my bills, have fun, shop hard and be responsible. Now if only I could get back to the part about saving...

Today, I'm young, fab & building--building a bright future for my little family. The purpose of this book is to share with other parents how I arrived where I am, and how you can do it too. Oh yeah, and I’m dating again. But there are no more children in the forecast. I’m done.