Stop making yourself feel poor

Okay, so maybe the lion’s share of your paycheck is spent before it even hits your bank account. Assure yourself that this is only a temporary situation and you’re already making progress by choosing take control of your life. But don’t be fooled, having a positive attitude and a commitment to improvement can be completely derailed by lurking reminders of what is missing from your life.

If you’re anything like the other living, breathing, broke and glamorous then those missing things are probably an ignorant amount of designer clothes, shoes, accessories, a fresh condo or home fully furnished by Room & Board and the new BMW X6 (you know… to keep the kids safe). Look, I’m writing this guide and I STILL want most of those things. However, I’ve realized that the best way to address these urgent wants is to exercise prudent avoidance and be a smart shopper:

• Audit your email: It happens slowly, but after a while you realize that you’re subscribed to a ridiculous number of mailing lists, all of them telling you about the hottest new thing that you can’t have. Opt out. Seriously. Remove the temptation to “learn more” and “buy now.” On the other hand, some e-newsletters are very necessary when it comes time for shopping. For that I recommend setting up an email address to use exclusively for mailing lists. They’ll still be available when you need them, brandishing their sales and discount codes. Only now, they won’t pop up in your inbox 10 times a day.
• Don’t get mauled: The mall is a dangerous place for people trying to be financially responsible. All of those big, shiny “new arrivals” and “sale” signs. The power of suggestion is even stronger when you can’t hit delete. Window shopping can take a devastating turn once you try something on and see how good you look in it. Case in point: stay away from the stores unless you’ve got something to buy. When it is time to do some carefully-budgeted shopping, check the Sunday paper for coupons (Macy’s always has some) and sale announcements. For deep discounts, Smartbargains.com and Overstock.com are my favorites, hands down. I once got a pair of croc-embossed Charles David pumps for $47.
• Know your limits: Shop with cash to avoid blowing the budget. It’s that simple.
• Get stingy: Your hard-earned dollars are valuable; don’t waste them buying something that you aren’t 100% satisfied with. If the fit is just a bit off (and it can’t be tailored), if it’s not really your style, if it’s not practical, if you only feel “ho-hum” about it—don’t buy it. You may not have buyer’s remorse immediately, but you will once you notice that you’ve worn it twice in 12 months. Worse yet, if it’s still hanging up with tags attached after several months.
• Stretch your dollar: Don’t be seduced by the word SALE. Do a little shopping around (online saves gas!) so you have a frame of reference of what things should cost. I mean, should you really get excited that Old Navy is selling solid, ribbed tanks for $10 each? In my opinion, they should be two for $10, and they usually are at stores like H&M, Forever 21 and G+G/Rave. When shopping for yourself, allocate more money for classic, key pieces that will endure the changing fashion trends. Fad items and small accessories should account for a minimal amount of your spending. When it comes to kids’ clothes there are only three things to remember: clean, neat, and growing room. Seriously, no two year old craves Nikes (and if he or she does, that is a whole other discussion). Bearing that in mind, Target and Wal*Mart are your best friends when outfitting the kiddies. With $5 tops and tees, shorts and jeans for under $10, you will be able to do unbelievable things with $60.